just two best friends talking

Transcript: Departing from Platform 9 3/4

Transcript: Departing from Platform 9 3/4

Caitlin: Hello and welcome to Better Words. It’s our very first episode!

Michelle: Wooooo!

Caitlin: We’re so excited and we have a bit of a special treat for our very first episode. It’s a Harry Potter party!

[Both] Yay!

Caitlin: That sounded like so–

Michelle: Sorry if we just like blew your headphones out of your ears with that sound

Caitlin: Sorry. We’re just so excited. We couldn’t not do out first episode as Harry Potter. But um of course–

Michelle: Maybe we should introduce ourselves first?

Caitlin: Oh of course!

[laughing]

Caitlin: Guys, we will get better at this. But yes, it’s a Harry Potter episode. So I am Caitlin and I blog at Just a Bookish Babe and my co-host Michelle

Michelle: Hi! I blog at The Unfinished Bookshelf

Caitlin: So, we’re really just, as we’ve sort of been saying, we’re two book bloggers who happen to be best friends and we just sort of came up with this and, here we are

Michelle: We also live up the road from each other so–

Caitlin: It’s pretty easy to record actually

Michelle: You know it’s fine, because we would usually spend this time hanging out and chatting about books anyway, but know you get to hear our conversations too, which, I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but hopefully you like it

Caitlin: Hopefully. I mean, I think we’re pretty funny.

Michelle: Yep. I mean, hopefully. I think we are. That’s why we were like ‘hey, maybe people want to hear this, us talking crap about books’

[laughing]

Caitlin: Well, I hope you want to hear it–

Michelle: Well, that’s what podcasts are, I think. Anyway, that’s what my favourite ones are. So, we have an exciting episode planned all about our favourite book series

Caitlin: Ever

Michelle: Harry Potter

Caitlin: Harry Potter, yes. Okay. So my first question, Michelle, okay; how did you start reading Harry Potter?

Michelle: Okay, so I wasn’t allowed to read Harry Potter, um, at all as a kid

Caitlin: Was it because of like the witchcraft thing?

Michelle: Yeah. Yep. So my parents were pretty strict with me. I also wasn’t allowed to listen to the Spice Girls or Brittany Spears because of the sexual nature of their music videos or Christina Aguilera. I know, it was very strict

Caitlin: I don’t remember being that into them when I was younger. It was more like Hilary Duff

Michelle: Caitlin is a few years younger than me

Caitlin: Not by much

Michelle: But enough that when I was about six, when the Spice Girls were big and I wanted to listen to them because my friends listened to them, my mum was like ‘no you can’t, their lyrics are inappropriate for children’

Caitlin: [singing] If you wanna be my lover…

Michelle: Now I see that, but then I was like ‘why is life so unfair. Ugh’

Caitlin: Anyway, Harry Potter

Michelle: Harry Potter was part of that as well. Neither of my parents wanted me to read Harry Potter. I think I was about 11 or 12 when my dad was home from work with a broken ankle and he was watching Oprah, as you do (or Opera as my nana calls her)

Caitlin: [laughs]

Michelle: So, Oprah, thank you for bringing Harry Potter into my life. Um. He was watching an interview with JK Rowling, on Oprah and she’s talking about how she had the book rejected so many times and I don’t know, he just was really impressed by her and was like ‘I think you’re old enough to read it now’ and so of course I was like–

Caitlin: When was that?

Michelle: I was in grade 7, so I think was 11 because my birthday is in October

Caitlin: Oh, 11. You were 11–

Michelle: Oh! I was the perfect age, I didn’t realise. So yeah, my birthday’s in October so this was at the start of Grade 7. So I was 11 years old, perfect age for Harry Potter now that I think about it. Of course, when he told me that after school one day I was like ‘oh my god, take me to the library right now’. It took me the whole weekend to read. I loved it so much, I immediately was like ‘please, buy me the rest of these books’, which he did, but also–

Caitlin: When would this have been up to? Probably like book five?

Michelle: No, number six was out, but number six was out in hardback–

Caitlin: Oh okay

Michelle: You know, they have that year of hardback before they bring out the paperback, so it must have only just been released. Um, and my dad picked it up though, before I had returned it to the library and started reading it and was like, ‘hey, this is kinda good’. So, when I discovered Harry Potter, my dad was reading it at the same time because he was home with his broken ankle–

Caitlin: Oh that’s good

Michelle: and couldn’t work. Yeah, it was– so we ended up being quite obsessed with it and talking about it and then of course, when book seven came out I had caught up and I probably only had to wait about six months, which is nothing compared to the time other people had to wait, but I did the whole thing where– So, Rockhampton doesn’t have– Oh, hi, we’re both from Rockhampton–

Caitlin: Just in case

Michelle: Just in case you don’t know. Beef Capital of Australia, I will plug that one. But it is in Central Queensland, it is a regional city, I’m going to call it a city. I have arguments with my friend, hi Antony it’s a city, I know he’s going to be listening to this

Caitlin: [laughs]

Michelle: So yeah, it’s a city. But we don’t have a bookshop any more. Very disappointing for us, but probably good for our bank balances.

Caitlin: Yeah, for sure

Michelle: But at the time, we did have an Angus and Robertson and I remember pre-ordering it, and I got my little card and I lined up on the day and I got my book and um, dad just read the last chapter and found out what happened because he wasn’t going to be bothered reading the whole book. By that stage he was over it, but I loved it. So yeah, that’s how Harry Potter came into my life and when I started reading Harry Potter, that’s when I became very good friends with some people at school. I kind of was a real nerd and had no friends before that, it was very sad. Um, I was getting bullied a little bit, but this kind of found me friends and connected me and I think that’s a story that I keep seeing from a lot of people online. As you know, a lot of people have been talking about their Harry Potter experiences with the 20 years, it’s been so lovely to see the impact this has had on people’s lives–

Caitlin: I definitely agree

Michelle: –and how they found people in the fandom. How about you?

Caitlin: On the friend thing, I don’t know if I necessarily have made friends specifically because of Harry Potter, but it has definitely strengthened so many of my friendships because of the shared love

Michelle: Yes. It’s something you can connect to

Caitlin: Yeah. But as for how I started reading the series? I do not remember

Michelle: [laughs]

Caitlin: I have to say, I really don’t remember. What I do remember is being about five years old, or six years old, I remember going to a friend’s birthday party and we were watching Chamber of Secrets and I went dressed as Hermione Granger because, those of you who do know me, my hair is like Hermione Granger’s–

Michelle: You’re nerdy too

Caitlin: It was not a very hard costume to create, let’s be real. But, um, yeah so I remember that and–

Michelle: Oh, it’s like Hermione Granger’s hair in the first two movies as well

Caitlin: Yeah. That was literally what my hair was like then. Thanks to layers and thinning haircuts, it’s not as, you know–

Michelle: I don’t know. This morning when you put your hair up in a bun, I was like ‘whoa, what the hell is going on with that hair girl’

Caitlin: [laughs] too much hair. Um, yeah so I don’t remember actually reading the first couple. I remember going to Harry Potter parties and watching the early movies. I do remember that my mum always had the rule that I had to read the book before seeing the movie and so that’s– but I only remember reading Order of the Phoenix when the movie was coming out

Michelle: I wasn’t allowed to watch the movies either for– so I was in Year 7, read them all at the start of Year 7. Dad made me a deal. We bought the movies on DVD, I wasn’t allowed to watch them until the end of of Grade 7, dependant on my results

Caitlin: Ohhhh

Michelle: Can we see how I ended up like Hermione? Clearly I wanted to watch those movies

Caitlin: Bribery [laughs]

Michelle: When I was in Year 6, my report card said I talked too much (surprise!) um, my dad was like ‘if your report card comes back saying you talked less during class, I’ll get you a new book’ so I shut up pretty quick

Caitlin: [laughs]

Michelle: Anyway, sorry

Caitlin: That’s amazing. Um, yes so I have a couple of Harry Potter memories like that. Like, I remember when, it must have been in Grade 3, I remember me and I my friends would recite the Howler, from the second movie

Michelle: Oh my god

Caitlin: We would just stand there screaming at each other. It was so much fun. But, um, but yes, no I remember reading Order of the Phoenix because the movie was coming out, or had just come out because I was a bit– like we’ve already said, I was a bit younger than Michelle so I was reading them, probably around the same time, but I was a bit younger. So the movies were coming out and everything. But yes, I remember reading it and I remember reading the first chapter of Order of the Phoenix, which is Dudley Demented, when they get attacked by the Dementors and I remember my mum asking me how I was liking it and I said ‘I already can’t wait to see how they do this in the movie’

[laughter]

Caitlin: Because Dudley was all, like, messed up you know?

Michelle: Yeah. I think he does a good job of that in the films

Caitlin: Yeah, no I really like that

Michelle: Although, I’ve got to say, Order of the Phoenix is my least favourite. I’ve never re-read Order of the Phoenix

Caitlin: Oh see, I have but I agree it’s sort of my least favourite. It always takes me a while to read because–

Michelle: Oh, it’s massive. That is such a turn-off as well and it’s– I don’t like a lot of what happens in that year at school, I just, I– My favourite two I’ve re-read multiple times: books six and seven ‘cause they’re my favourite and yeah, for some reason I always skip Goblet of Fire and Order of the Phoenix and–

Caitlin: I like–

Michelle: It’s not a very orthodox point of view, is it?

Caitlin: I like Order of the Phoenix, I mean, I like them all, let’s be real. But I probably like Order of the Phoenix least. Unfortunately. Which is a shame. I don’t really know why it is because I love Dumbledore’s Army.

Michelle: Yeah

Caitlin: I think I don’t like– I mean, Harry is so angry in that one obviously

Michelle: Angsty teen

Caitlin: Yeah. And I think Umbridge is so annoying. And of course as you get to the end, you know what’s going to happen. You know you’re going to get to that point where Sirius dies. It’s real sad

Michelle: I mean, spoiler alert. But if you haven’t read it by now

Caitlin: Oh, I am not apologising for spoiling it. Even the eighth–

Michelle: You should know what’s happening now

Caitlin: The eighth movie came out like five years ago, I’m not apologising

Michelle: That’s true. Where have you been living if you haven’t at least watched Harry Potter?

Caitlin: Yeah. I’m sorry, I’m not apologising for any spoilers in case you don’t know what happens in this series

Michelle: Before we talk about our next little topic, I do just want to do a shoutout to Nook & Burrow because we are burning, the Buttery Beer candle from Form & Flux which is sold by Nook & Burrow, I think they make them too, I’m not really sure how the names work. Apologies Kate if you’re listening–

Caitlin: Sorry, but it smells amazing

Michelle: It does. It smells amazing. It’s so caramely and beautiful and I love it. We also have some chocolate frogs here as well which we’re going to eat later on

Caitlin: Yes. We do. And I’ve been like holding my wand this whole time. We’re really feeling the Harry Potter love

[laughter]

Michelle: Yeah

Caitlin: Actually, the next thing I was going to ask you, which you’ve kind of already touched on is: which is your favourite book and which is your favourite movie

Michelle: Okay, so. I’ve kind of already said six and seven are my favourite books, but if I had to choose out of them… ummm… I think maybe six

Caitlin: Six is definitely my favourite. Half-Blood Prince is the best

Michelle: But it’s the worst movie, I will just say

Caitlin: Ohhh, I disagree

Michelle: Oh really?

Caitlin: I love it

Michelle: I hate that they cut out the little fight at the end. I was like–  we were in the cinema, I was in the cinema with dad and was like ‘wait ‘til you get to the battle, wait ‘til you get to the battle’ and they bloody cut it out

Caitlin: In the sixth one? With all the Death Eaters there? Oh okay that’s a good point–

Michelle: That’s what I don’t like about it

Caitlin: Because then Bill Weasley just kind of shows up as half a werewolf

Michelle: I agree. Which is why my favourite movie– can I pick Deathly Hallows Part I and II? I can’t separate them.

Caitlin: Okay, but if I had to separate them, I really like Part I

Michelle: I was going to say Part I. Yeah. Because I’m just so happy that it’s so close– I mean, I’m not happy that every single trilogy or series afterwards had to copy them, but I am so happy that they split them and that it was so–

Caitlin: Oh yeah

Michelle: After the disappointment

Caitlin: Can you imagine how bad it would have been if they hadn’t split them?

Michelle: I know. After the disappointment of number six–

Caitlin: Everything would have been cut out

Michelle: I was like so thankful they kept everything in, it’s so close to the book. So, yeah. I think what I really liked–

Caitlin: While I do understand about those kind of things being cut out of the sixth movie, but at the same time–

Michelle: I mean the rest of the movie was good

Caitlin: Oh, it’s just the best because I mean everything– we have all this stuff about Voldemort and Dumbledore’s past and like all of that learning and–

Michelle: Yes, I think that’s what I liked

Caitlin: Leading up, leading up to this finale that we get but then at the same time I mean, Harry with the pincers [clicking noise] and Hermione being jealous of Ron and Lavender and them just–

Michelle: Harry and Ginny kiss. Ahhh

Caitlin: That’s actually probably my least favourite bit in the movie because movie Ginny is ridiculous, let’s just all agree on that now, but it’s so great because it’s like a teen comedy, but it’s Harry Potter. It’s so good

Michelle: It is. She does really weave in the teenage-ness. I don’t know if that’s a word, but I just made it a word

Caitlin: I just really love book six because– I mean I really like them both, and the movie. Slughorn is very interesting as well

Michelle: Yes. I like Slughorn and I like the way we start to see more of the politics coming through. Like, as Harry has grown up. I mean you start to get a glimpse of it–

Caitlin: Well, Fudge is not at the Ministry of Magic anymore

Michelle: Yeah. But we also, like you start to get a hint of it in Prisoner of Azkaban where there’s that conversation that he overhears about Sirius, you start to understand that there’s this whole political system that drives the wizarding world, but it’s so much more apparent. And the thing I loved in number six was that’s starting to bring in our world and the real-world English Prime Minister and stuff

Caitlin: I love that chapter

Michelle: I loved that suddenly there was– you could start to see this system that drives it and there’s so much more depth than just going to a magic school and it really brings in this idea of this whole community and society and world. Which  is really cool, because obviously then Fantastic Beasts that expands to show that it’s not just Ministry of Magic in England, but MCUSA

Caitlin: Well yeah, exactly. On that, let’s talk about Fantastic Beasts

Michelle: Wait, wait, wait. You didn’t say what your favourite movie was. Your favourite book and movie

Caitlin: Okay, so hang on. Your favourite book?

Michelle: Number six

Caitlin: Favourite movie? Number seven, part I

Michelle: Seven, part I

Caitlin: Okay. My favourite movie. I don’t want to say six and six. I think my favourite– my favourite book and favourite movie, I’ve never really been able to choose from Prisoner of Azkaban and Half-Blood Prince for either

Michelle: Oh okay, yep

Caitlin: For the sake of this, at this time, right now, I’m going to say favourite movie Prisoner of Azkaban. Favourite book, Half-Blood Prince

Michelle: Okay

Caitlin: Okay. Now on to Fantastic Beasts

Michelle: Okay so, I loved the movie. I loved it

Caitlin: So good

Michelle: Ohhh my goodness

Caitlin: It was really good. It was just everything I was expecting. I actually have a good story to tell about this

Michelle: Okay! Tell me, tell me

Caitlin: Okay so, when Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them came out, I was actually on my first overseas trip so I actually saw the movie in Mexico

Michelle: That’s right, we were all going to go and then we went without out

Caitlin: I think before I left I threatened my friends and was like ‘you can see it, but we have to see it when I get back’

Michelle: And then we didn’t

Caitlin: I didn’t hold you up to that because I saw it already when I was in Mexico, so with that I actually saw Animales fantásticos

[laughter]

Michelle: Very nice pronunciation there

Caitlin: And yes, thank you. Yes, no it was in English otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to keep up with it. It was in English with Spanish subtitles. But yes, no that was really awesome and I’m always going to remember that. And I made my aunt who I was travelling with, I made her take photos with the poster and everything because I was like ‘it’s Animales fantásticos’. It was just so cool

Michelle: That’s so cool. Well, I was just here

Caitlin: Oh whatever, you were here, I was in another country

Michelle: It would have been nice if we’d all been able to see it together because at that point we had a nice little group

Caitlin: We haven’t watched it together ye

Michelle: We haven’t! We should do that for this podcast

Caitlin: Yes

Michelle: So keen for that. We’re not going to– like obviously we’ll go do it and then talk about it. We’re not gonna make– anyway, I’m going to shut up now. So I really loved it. I loved the setting and the Art Deco Ohhhh

Caitlin: Oh yes. It was beautiful. And all of the costumes

Michelle: It was so gorgeous

Caitlin: I think my favourite thing was Queenie

Michelle: Yes. Queenie is everything

Caitlin: I love Queenie so much. Ahhh

Michelle: She is–

Caitlin: I mean Tina is good, but Queenie though. She was so cute

Michelle: Um, can we just talk about how cute Jacob is? I just love him as a character and he better be coming back because he was awesome

Caitlin: I think it was announced that he is

Michelle: Oh thank god. Okay, he is so cute

Caitlin: I was really worried about that because–

Michelle: Oh, wait but, but, but, but then he comes up with all that stuff for the bakery. Like I thought the ending was super cute

Caitlin: Yes

Michelle: Like, just a hint of what they–

Caitlin: And they were like, ‘how do you come up with this stuff?’ and he’s like ‘I dunno! I dunno!’

[laughter]

Caitlin: Ohhh so adorable

Michelle: It’s such a cute way to end the movie, that Newt helps him out and stuff–

Caitlin: Yes, with the eggs

Michelle: And the hint at Newt and Tina’s relationship which is confirmed if you have looked at Fantastic Beasts

Caitlin: Well, exactly

Michelle: If you haven’t looked at the book–

Caitlin: If you look at the textbook–

Michelle: They are together

Caitlin: If you have the textbook that JK Rowling published a couple of years ago, it actually has a bit about Newt Scamander before any of this movie or the screenplay came up and he is married to Tina so, we’ll get there in this series

Michelle: Eddie Redmayne is just–

Caitlin: Oh he is perfect as Newt

Michelle: He is so good and I first–

Caitlin: He is so good. The dance!

Michelle: What dance?

Caitlin: The mating dance. Best bit ever

Michelle: Oh my goodness. So cute

Caitlin: I love that he’s a Hufflepuff too. Hufflepuff present. Represent!

Michelle: Just in case anyone is wondering, I’m a Ravenclaw. Yep. No one was wondering. It’s fine.

[laughter]

Michelle: No one’s probably listening. Hi mum, if you’re listening. Oh well. Anyway

Caitlin: Whatever

Michelle: [laughs] If you’re listening, thanks for joining us

[laughter]

Michelle: Anyway I love Eddie Redmayne. I first saw him in Pillars of the Earth, I think  before he got kind of famous. I feel like a hipster being like ‘I liked him as an actor’ before he was famous

Caitlin: I don’t know what I would have first seen him is, but to be honest it was probably the Les Mis movie–

Michelle: Oh true! Yeah well he was– my research might be wrong, but you know what I’m not going to do any research, let’s be honest, the bare minimum research we have to for this, but I think Pillars of the Earth probably came out before Les Mis and he was just like, he was a small character which became a bigger character in Pillars of the Earth. I mean, if you haven’t watched Pillars of the Earth series, if you like Game of Thrones, you’ll like Pillars of the Earth. Just if you’re looking for a new book there

Caitlin: The other thing, was the current stage of this franchise–

Michelle: Oh wait, wait, wait. Before we go on, sorry can we just talk about one thing I hate in Fantastic Beasts?

Caitlin: Johnny Depp

Michelle: Yes. How’d you know I was going to say that?

Caitlin: Because you hate Johnny Depp

Michelle: True

Caitlin: [laughs]

Michelle: Can we just, like– why is someone who–

Caitlin: Wait. You know what I don’t understand about that?

Michelle: What?

Caitlin: Is like when it was revealed or whatever that it was actually Johnny Depp, I was super confused because how didn’t that get leaked?

Michelle: Oh, like that it was going to be him?

Caitlin: How did we know everything about the movie, but not that Johnny Depp is in the movie?

Michelle: I’m just so disappointed–

Caitlin: Yeah

Michelle: Because, I mean stop giving this guy good roles

Caitlin: I think it’s a bit of an odd choice to be honest. That’s not what I thought Grindlewald would look like at all

Michelle: Apart from that, can we stop giving this guy high profile roles? Like, [sigh] I– okay, I, I, I just boycotted the latest Pirates of the Caribbean movie, although I have heard that Paul McCartney is in it, so I kinda want to see it being a Beatles freak, but I just– I just

Caitlin: What? I didn’t know that?

Michelle: Oh yes! Someone wrote on my Instagram that– I think I did a post about the Beatles and someone was like ‘did you know Paul’s in the–’ yeah. Apparently he is.

Caitlin: That’s so bizarre. Anyway

Michelle: Anyway, um I–

Caitlin: In case you can’t tell, we’re just not really Johnny Depp fans

Michelle: Um, in case you haven’t heard any of the stuff about Johnny Depp, it’s alleged that he abused his ex-partner Amber Heard and I mean, only like a week or two ago, they– like his ex-publicists came out with confirmation that she’s not just making this up– oh, that was my ring, sorry [laughs]. She’s not just making this up, like, people have come out and corroborated her story so why are we giving him roles, and I read this really great article, I can’t re– I think it was for, I can’t remember which publication it was for, but we’ll link it, but it basically said that like that the generation after us, or people after us are gonna look at Johnny Depp the way we look at Bill Cosby and be like ‘why was he so famous? Why was he so popular when all these abuse allegations–’

Caitlin: Gosh, that’s interesting

Michelle: Like, okay, he’s abuse of Amber Heard isn’t the same as the allegation against Bill Cosby, the rape allegations and stuff, but it’s still horrible nonetheless and it’s still, I don’t think he should be getting parts because, I just– he’s not even that great of an actor. Like, he just plays the same character in every project

Caitlin: I mean, we are not Johnny Depp fans and, you know, we both know plenty of people that are

Michelle: Like, my best friends who are probably going to listen to this are going to be like ‘what the hell, is that why you didn’t come to Pirates of the Caribbean’ I’m sorry, but I just don’t like him as– we’re both feminists and I think we both– these abuse allegations are really bad. I didn’t like him that much before, but these abuse allegations, it’s like don’t give this guy roles

Caitlin: I have to admit, also– I think my favourite Johnny Depp role, that I’ve really seen– you know, I appreciate umm… oh what is it, um [laughs] oh shoot

Michelle: Edward Scissorhands

Caitlin: Yes! That’s what I was thinking of

[laughter]

Michelle: I just guessed that. I just guessed

Caitlin: I mean, I appreciate– I haven’t seen it in years, but I appreciate it

Michelle: It’s so old. He’s not going to be the same actor anymore

Caitlin: Well, exactly. I appreciate some of his younger stuff, like Edward Scissorhands and What’s Eating Gilbert Grape

Michelle: Yeah, Gilbert Grape is really good

Caitlin: But even–

Michelle: Those movies are like 25 years old now

Caitlin: I know, but that’s my point. The more recent things, the only more recent movies that he’s been in that I’ve really appreciated, he’s not even really in it and that’s because he has a cameo in 21 Jump Street

Michelle: [laughs]

Caitlin: And I thought that it was really funny because obviously he was in the original TV series, which I have never seen, but–

Michelle: And that’s what this article was saying, as well. That you know, roles that he’s taken on that haven’t been box office successes would have ruined the career of another actor

Caitlin: Yeah

Michelle: And I just– I don’t care if there’s a character change mid-way through Fantastic Beasts because they did it with Harry Potter, just take Johnny Depp out of Fantastic Beasts, please

Caitlin: To be fair, when they did it with Harry Potter, it was because actors had died

Michelle: Yeah well, this guy allegedly abused his girlfriend

Caitlin: Wouldn’t be the first time anyone got replaced and I want to see what happens with the character of Grindlewald in the continuation of this series

Michelle: It’s just really like, I kind of, it’s sad that like why is this happening when JK Rowling is so outspoken on a lot of things. Why is Johnny Depp in the film? Because we know she’s involved in the process

Caitlin: Well yeah, but you know what? The timing was really off. By the time this came out–

Michelle: That’s true

Caitlin: By the time it came out, this is the last thing I’m going to say on this topic, but when it actually came out and when I was actually watching it, the last thing I had really known about it

Michelle: [sharp intake of breath]

Both: Was the thing with the dogs

Michelle: Oh, okay so if you’re not listening from Australia or don’t follow the news that much, Johnny Depp apparently, according to this article allegedly knew that he was smuggling his dogs into Australia

Caitlin: Well, because they came in by like a private plane, he smuggled his dogs into Australia

Michelle: Allegedly, but

Caitlin: It turned into a whole big thing here, it was while he was filming the last Pirates of the Caribbean movie

Michelle: Okay let’s be honest–

Caitlin: Honestly, the whole situation was hilarious

Michelle: I’m going to be the grumpy person here and say biosecurity is important

Caitlin: No, there is a reason why we have so many laws about it in Australia

Michelle: More was made because of who he is. There were some funny things said by our Deputy Prime Minister, not necessarily saying I agree with them, all I’m going to say is biosecurity is important. If I can find the videos of the apology from Amber Heard and Johnny Depp

Caitlin: Hilarious

Michelle: They look like they’re being held hostage by Barnaby Joyce

[laughter]

Caitlin: There is an Australian YouTuber, she did one where it was like their video and then it would sort of cut to her where she was like directing it

[laughter]

Caitlin: She was like ‘no! Don’t be grumpy’

[laughter]

Michelle: I feel like, I feel like Barnaby Joyce was like ‘yes, this is what we want’. But yes, I’m sorry, Pistol and Boo should have been declared, that’s all I’m going to say on the matter

Caitlin: It’s a bit of a–

Michelle: oh and a final, final thing: Let’s get Johnny Depp out of Fantastic Beasts

Caitlin: Onto different casting in Fantastic Beasts: Jude Law as Albus Dumbledore. Opinions.

Michelle: Well, I do like Jude Law–

Caitlin: I think he’s going to do a really good job

Michelle: A lot more than Johnny Depp, just by the way

Caitlin: I’m looking forward to it

Michelle: Yeah, I’m looking forward to it. I’m really, like honestly am not looking forward to it if Johnny Depp is going to be in it. Like, honestly, it really puts me off even though I love this franchise so much. But Jude Law is brilliant

Caitlin: When it was first announced, I mean, I don’t really know what I expected young Dumbledore to look like

Michelle: Yeah, I like Jude Law. He’s good

Caitlin: Okay. Other things. Cursed Child

Michelle: Um. Okay. You have a lot of opinions on this

Caitlin: I want to see the play so badly

Michelle: Oh yeah, I want to see it live, but since we live in Australia, until it starts touring it’s probably not going to be possible to see it, so what did you think of the book/script

Caitlin: It’s not a book

Michelle: Okay

Caitlin: It’s a screenplay, in my opinion

Michelle: The book copy of the script then

Caitlin: It was a rehearsal script. My biggest thing with this was that everyone I think expected it to be the eighth book and it is not the eighth book, it is a story originating– we don’t really know a lot about this actually, but the story originated obviously it’s based on a story by JK Rowling, whether this means she had anything to do with the actual plot for Cursed Child, we don’t know

Michelle: Yeah, it is hard to know

Caitlin: Basically, based on a story by JK Rowling could refer to the original series

Michelle: That’s true

Caitlin: I don’t know that much about it. Although, it is an official Harry Potter thing

Michelle: Yeah

Caitlin: She would have had something to do with it, or okayed it. So yes, no matter what your opinion on the story line is, I actually think it’s quite interesting

Michelle: I do, but the thing with the trolley lady was weird. A couple of things are weird but overall I enjoyed it. It’s not an eighth book. I see it something else that’s out there, doesn’t have to–

Caitlin: It’s just like Fantastic Beasts. Lots of people will say that things in Fantastic Beasts maybe don’t line up, about what we know from– about Dumbledore and Grindlewald from the original series, but it’s an extension just like Cursed Child is an extension and oh, my biggest thing with this is, yes, people expected an eighth book, but I think they were reading it as a book. We are both actually–

Michelle: Oh, well let’s– I mean, okay. Caitlin more so than me. Caitlin, you’ve done way more– I’ve done one. I’ve done one–

Caitlin: You’re still into theatre

Michelle: Yeah

Caitlin: I’ve done more shows both backstage and being on stage in productions here, but I think that means a lot of people don’t know how to read a script like that

Michelle: Yeah

Caitlin: When you’re reading it, novels obviously have such rich descriptive language, with a stage play, it’s different because we don’t get told that much about what they’re wearing or what the set looks like so you have to imagine it. And when I was reading it and imaging it, I was really imaging it on a stage, like I was in the audience and reading the script and looking up and seeing these people and it did, it did help a little bit that we have obviously seen pictures of the original cast so I could imagine them, but it’s not a book, guys

Michelle: I will say–

Caitlin: Don’t read it as a book

Michelle: I do love Hermione as Minister for Magic

Caitlin: Yes, so do I

Michelle: Oh and you know what? I love black Hermione as well, if I can say it like that. I love the cast that was chosen for the play. If you have an issue with that, get out. Like, just go. It’s brilliant. Hermione can be anyone. Hermione is all of us.

Caitlin: Hermione is everyone. Everyone is Hermione. I mean, the only thing is like, guess what? Even if they re-do them or maybe if they do make Cursed Child into a movie or if JK Rowling does write a different eighth sort of installment that isn’t Cursed Child, that is something different, the cast– Harry, Ron and Hermione are never going to be Danielle, Emma and Rupert ever again

Michelle: Yeah. And let’s be honest, a lot of us, like I look at Emma Watson and I’m like yes, she’s Hermione to me. But she’s Hermione for a specific generation and we can have ner Hermiones. And I saw this really beautiful thing, this is off topic a little bit, but I saw this really beautiful thing that was like a generation grew up with Hermione Granger being Emma Watson or, sorry, with Emma Watson being Hermione Granger and now a new generation are going to grow up with her being Belle and I loved that. That is so sweet

Caitlin: That is sweet. I loved Emma as Belle

Michelle: But, like, let’s, let’s– they are the movie. Guys, let’s be honest there could be reboots of Harry Potter in the future, I mean, look at how many–

Caitlin: They probably will

Michelle: I mean, we have different versions of Anne of Green Gables, which is a different topic, but you know they have different versions of Pride and Prejudice and stuff. There’s no guaranteeing  that these people will be the only people who will ever play that cast

Caitlin: I am sure in our lifetime that we will see a reboot of Harry Potter and to be perfectly honest with you, it would be my dream for Emma Watson to play Minerva McGonagall

Michelle: Yes

Caitlin: And Daniel Radcliffe to play Severus

Michelle: Ohhh that’s a good one

Caitlin: And Rupert Grint, I want to say Mr Weasley but it’s so easy, but I think he would also make a really good Dumbledore

Michelle: Oh really?

Caitlin: It’s really weird but I would like to see it. I think it’s a bit strange, but obviously if they’re a lot older. I mean, Rupert Grint people kind of tend to focus on Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson, I think, but Rupert Grint is great

Michelle: Rupert Grint is brilliant in this film called Wild Target, with Emily Blunt. This was like, before she was super famous, I loved Emily Blunt. I think it came out in 2011. That was the first time I’d seen her in anything big. I loved her. That’s got Bill Nighy. I made Caitlin watch it because it’s one of my favourite movies

Caitlin: It’s so good

Michelle: So yeah, if you haven’t watched that, Wild Target is underrated as well. But Rupert Grint is so funny in it

Caitlin: You know what I also think is a bit underrated for Rupert Grint, to be honest? The Lego House clip

Michelle: Ohh how’d I know you were going to say that?! I was gonna say it. Yes

Caitlin: He’s so good in that. It’s a bit silly to say, but you know. Also, have you seen that video of Rupert Grint reading Shape of You as a dramatic poem?

Michelle: No! We’re going to link that. We’ll link that

Caitlin: He’s like [serious] ‘I’m in love with your body’.

[laughter]

Caitlin: It’s fantastic. I’m going to make you watch it afterwards.

Michelle: Okay. Then we’re going to link it, so you can watch it with us

[laughter]

Michelle: Oh my god, that’s so good

Caitlin: Alright Michelle, now I have some games for you

Michelle: Didn’t you say you had a present. Not being greedy, but you said something about a present?

Caitlin: I’m so excited about Harry Potter that I forgot about our present. But yes, I did get Michelle a present for our first episode. It’s Harry Potter themed

Michelle: I feel bad because I didn’t get Caitlin a present

Caitlin: Oh whatever, it’s fine. I mean, I have to admit, when you see it (and we’ll tell you about it, obviously) you will understand

Michelle: Okay. That’s fine. I haven’t seen it, we’re opening it on air. While you get that, I’m going to take a bite of my chocolate frog

Caitlin: Close your eyes

Michelle: Eyes closed. Hands out. Oh my god, it’s like fabric-y. Oh my god! Okay, these are– my mouth is full of chocolate, you go first [laughs]

Caitlin: Okay, I got myself Hufflepuff socks and Michelle Ravenclaw socks, so–

Michelle: Oh my goodness and they have the deathly hallows. So there’s a pack of three. I’m guessing these are from Jay Jays which is my favourite–

Caitlin: Yes

Michelle: My favourite Harry Potter supplies store is Jay Jays

Caitlin: Yes, fantastic. So mine, we– I have like black and yellow stripes with the Hufflepuff crest

Michelle: Those ones are so cute

Caitlin: Then I have ones with the little scar and glasses in the house colours and then ones that have the symbols, so it’s got lions and badgers and eagles

Michelle: [laughs] lions and tigers and bears

Both: oh my

[laughter]

Michelle: So mine, I’ve got one that’s like blue and black with the Ravenclaw crest, and then I’ve got the same black with the house animals and then a pair of white with black deathly hallows symbols on them which is so cool. Thank you!

Caitlin: So we have matching Harry Potter socks now

Michelle: Yay! This is so cute

Caitlin: In our respective houses

Michelle: And you know what? I’m sure that these are going to make an appearance on our respective Instagrams as well

Caitlin: 100 per cent

[laughter]

Michelle: We might even post a picture on our Better Words Instagram @bookish– oh god, what am I saying

Caitlin: First episode, it’s okay

[laughter]

Caitlin: Better Words. This podcast is called Better Words.

Michelle: Not bookish podcast, that’s a description

Caitlin: Okay, now are you ready for the games?

Michelle: Yes. Can I– okay, I’m going to take another bite of my Freddo though. Oh wait! Are we gonna try the– we’ve got some Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans here to try. Okay.

Caitlin: So, okay, first one we’re going to do is like This or That. I’m going to tell you a few things and you have to pick. Don’t take too long and I don’t really want explanations

Michelle: Okay. Fine, I’ll try then. I’ll do what I’m told

Caitlin: Okay. So, Harry Potter This or That. Gryffindor or Slytherin?

Michelle: Gryffindor

Caitlin: Gryffindor. Hermione or Ginny?

Michelle: Hermione. 100 per cent. I am her.

Caitlin: Alright. Fine. Harry–

Michelle: Wait. Which one are you going?

Caitlin: Ginny. I mean, I love Hermione, but Ginny

Michelle: Okay. This is good. To have some diversity

Caitlin: Okay. Harry or Ron?

Michelle: Ron

Caitlin: Ron. Neville or Luna?

Michelle: Neville

Caitlin: Luna

Michelle: Neville’s so loyal. I love him

Caitlin: I love Luna. She’s nuts. Every single, like quiz which is like ‘which Harry Potter character are you?’ I get Luna [laughs]

Michelle: I never really do them, because let’s be honest, I’m going to get Hermione

[laughter]

Michelle: And if I didn’t, the quiz is broken

[laughter]

Caitlin: Okay. Snape or Umbridge?

Michelle: Ohh Snape. Snape, Snape

Caitlin: Severus Snape

[laughter]

Michelle: I’ll link that video too, if you haven’t seen it

Caitlin: Okay. Dumbledore or Voldemort

Michelle: Dumbledore

Caitlin: I find Voldemort really interesting. I think his background is really interesting

Michelle: Dumbledore’s got some secrets too

Caitlin: Yeah, I know

Michelle: Exposure in Fantastic Beasts, hopefully

Caitlin: Yes. Okay. Actually, I know I said no explanations, but you know what I really want?

Michelle: What?

Caitlin: Is for us to find out that Ariana was an obscurus.

Michelle: Oh yeah. Yeah. I thought that

Caitlin: She 100 per cent is

Michelle: I thought that in the Fantastic Beasts movie, that’s what I thought too

Caitlin: Yep. Okay–

Michelle: Oh, just quietly too, while we’re talking about Fantastic Beasts um, I hope Credence comes back, but each time I hear his name, I just think Creedence Clearwater Revival cause I am an old person trapped inside a Millenial’s body

[laughter]

Caitlin: Okay, my next one: Hagrid or Minerva McGonagall?

Michelle: Aww this is hard!

Caitlin: I’m going McGonagall, she’s a badass

Michelle: I know, but I’m going to go Hagrid because he’s got like the heart of a giant, he’s so beautiful. I love Hagrid so much. The Hapee Birthdae cake gets me every time. Awww

Caitlin: Okay. Order of the Phoenix or Dumbledore’s Army

Michelle: Dumbledore’s Army

Caitlin: Yeah, same. Charms or transfiguration? I’d pick charms

Michelle: I’m picking transfiguration

Caitlin: Okay. History of Magic or Ancient Ruins?

Michelle: History of Magic

Caitlin: Yeah, same. Divination or Care of Magical Creatures?

Michelle: Care of Magical Creatures because Divination is bullshit

Caitlin: Honestly, I think I’d pick Divination. I’m not a big animal person–

Michelle: You just like cups of tea, don’t you? I don’t like animals either but I’d be like Hermione, I’d be like this is crap, I’m walking out

Caitlin: I think I would have fun with it. Thank you for that This or That

[laughter]

Michelle: That was cool

Caitlin: Now I have some Harry Potter Would You Rather?

Caitlin: So, my first question is: a gross Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Bean or a Cockroach Cluster?

Michelle: Wait. Do the Cockroach Clusters actually have cockroaches in them? Because that’s disgusting

Caitlin: To be honest, I’m not 100 per cent sure.

Michelle: Yuck. Beans. I don’t want to eat an insect. I know that’s like the next big thing, eating insects and stuff–

Caitlin: [rattles box] These are our jellybeans everyone

Michelle: The next big thing is eating insects, but [retching noise]

Caitlin: Okay. Just because we just mentioned it, I literally have some Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. We’re both going to try one and see what we get

Michelle: Oh my god. I’ve heard these are all bad. Okay. I’m getting a red one. Red with little dots on it. I hope it’s something nice–

Caitlin: I picked up a pink one that’s probably gonna be like bubblegum

Michelle: I hope it’s something nice like strawberry. Ew that’s gross

Caitlin: I got a grey one that’s got black dots on it

Michelle: Okay.

[eating]

Michelle: This is okay, but I thought because–

Caitlin: I’m not really sure because–

Michelle: I’m not sure what it is, but I reckon it might be some sort of– earthworm! Ew that’s gross. That’s what I got

Caitlin: I think I got black pepper. Eugh.

Michelle: Ew. Earthworm. Yuck.

[laughter]

Caitlin: Okay, so that’s for bearing with us through that. Okay, my next question: Would you rather fight a Basilisk or be a champion in the Tri-Wizard Tournament?

Michelle: Obviously if you do Bas– [mumbles] my pronunciation is terrible. If you fight a Basilisk, you only have to do it once. Tri-Wizard tournament is a tournament so you have multiple challenges where you can die

Caitlin: You can die from a Basilisk

Michelle: Well, I know–

Caitlin: Basilisk venom only has one antidote

Michelle: What is that again?

Caitlin: Phoenix tears

Michelle: Oh that’s right! [laughs] I am an idiot. Um. Ahhh that’s really hard. I don’t want to fight a Basilisk

Caitlin: Sheer survival, I know, sheer survival, because what if I don’t have a Phoenix, I think I’m going to have to go Tri-Wizard Tournament

Michelle: I know, but I’m just so lazy for that

Caitlin: At least you get time to prepare

Michelle: That’s true. They do– you do get some skills. I want to do Tri-Wizard Tournament too because like, at least you get glory if you get through at the end. What do you get from a Basilisk?

Caitlin: Yeah you win like, 1000 gallons don’t you? Galleons. Gallons? Not gallons, Galleons.

Michelle: We’re going to tell you right from the first episode, this podcast is going to test our pronunciation skills

Caitlin: Of so many things. I mean, I love this series so much and I just said gallons, not Galleons.

Michelle: And I will say we have pre-recorded some other episodes before this and we are terrible at pronunciation, particularly me. Um, but yeah bear with us

Caitlin: Not particularly you, but that’s okay. Okay, my next Would You Rather question.

Michelle: Yes

Caitlin: Would you rather spend one night in Azkaban or break into Gringotts?

Michelle: I’m gonna go Azkaban

Caitlin: Same. Because if you break into Gringotts you might have to spend the rest of your life there

Michelle: Oh, I didn’t even think of that. I just thought breaking in sounds hard and just staying in a place overnight and trying to think happy thoughts doesn’t sound that bad

Caitlin: I mean, I’m sure it would be awful

Michelle: Oh yeah, I’m sure, but breaking in sounds like way too much work

[laughter]

Michelle: –for this lazy person, this lazy muggle

Caitlin: Okay, now I have– my next two questions are a bit similar

Michelle: Mhmm

Caitlin: Would you rather date Cho Chang or date Lavender Brown?

Michelle: I’m going to go Cho Chang because Lavender sounds like a bit of a flake

Caitlin: I have to admit, I was gonna go with Lavender Brown because, well from what we really know about Cho Chang she seems a bit messed up and at least Lavender Brown would be fun to hang around with.

Michelle: That’s true

Caitlin: She’s just not Ron’s cup of tea, because Ron’s in love with Hermione

Michelle: I’m still going to go with Cho Chang. I like her

Caitlin: Now, my next one: date Viktor Krum or Dean Thomas?

Michelle: Mmm Dean Thomas because he sounds more down to Earth than Vikor. Sorry, you seem like a bit of a dick

Caitlin: I mean, I have nothing against Vikor really, I just think Dean Thomas always seems a lot nicer and holy hell, the actor that plays him (I know it’s not really him), but the actor that played him in the movies is really attractive

Michelle: Yep. Yep, I’m going Dean. He just seems like down to Earth

Caitlin: Okay, now my last Would You Rather question. Would you rather have detention writing with Umbridge’s quill that writes with your blood or cleaning all the trophies in the trophy room, by hand while coughing up slugs?

Michelle: Oh my god, that’s such a good one [laughs]. Um, what would you go with?

Caitlin: I mean, the other one would like scar you for life. I mean,  while throwing up slugs is very annoying–

Michelle: That’s true. I have a very low pain threshold so I’m gonna go slugs

Caitlin: Yeah, me too

Michelle: I just can’t stand– I mean, waxing hurts so having a– just–

Caitlin: I really don’t think I could do that and it scars you for life and god knows what I’d have to write

Michelle: Yeah. Ouch

Caitlin: You know? Even if I was going to write ‘I love Harry Potter’ over and over again and that would be on my hand forever, I still don’t think I would want that on my hand forever

Michelle: The pain! No I’m not good with pain, even like little things so, nup, no I’m doing slugs

Caitlin: Okay–

Michelle: Slugs it is

Caitlin: Slugs it is. Okay, well there you go, that was all my Would You Rather questions actually. I hope you had fun with them

Michelle: Yeah, they were good

Caitlin: And I hope everyone that is listening to this enjoyed these little games because we are going to do these for the rest of the episodes. So not as many, this is more of a–

Michelle: This is our celebration

Caitlin: Harry Potter party, as we said. Um–

Michelle: But hey, Tweet us and let us know what your answers would be too

Caitlin: Exactly! Do you disagree with us? We had similar answers for a fair few of them.

Michelle: Let us know what house you’re in, let us know your favourite book and why. Where can people get in touch with us Caitlin?

Caitlin: @Betterwordspod on Twitter and Instagram, we also have a Facebook page @Betterwordspodcast and you can also check out our website betterwordspodcast.com. And please, if you liked this episode we would really love you to come back and listen to the rest of them, so you should subscribe on iTunes

Michelle: Because we have some really, really exciting guests coming up over the next few weeks

Caitlin: Even the next few days, because remember this is the first episode of our launch week, so today is Monday, the 31st of July. We have an episode coming out on Wednesday, Friday, next Monday and Wednesday and then our regular podcast day will be Wednesday after that

Michelle: So you have so many bookish things to enjoy this week. We love you for joining us, thank you so much for joining us. We really, really do appreciate it and hope that you enjoyed this too. Yeah, get in touch with us, let us know what you think on all these questions

Caitlin: Exactly. So, follow us on the socials and leave us a rating and review on iTunes and don’t forget to subscribe. And have a very Harry– [laughs] have a very happy Harry Potter day!

Both: Bye

[laughter]